Post by TheCommander on Jun 2, 2005 23:29:06 GMT -5
last night was just great. in fact, it was so great, that it sucked. what am i talking about here? well, you see, i went to work last night in pretty good spirits, because my day was pretty fun. then, work got pretty cool too, cuz they finally put me in drivethru, so i finally, FINALLY, got to leave grill. well, people come through, and i have some fun w/ them.
"Welcome to McDonald's on this fine night! May I interest you in a scrrrumptious apple pie?"
or
"Welcome to McDonald's on this glorious, peaceful night. May I interest you in one of our exotic fruit and walnut salads?"
...and so on, and so forth. you get the idea. actually, i liked doing that so much (great reactions from the customers) that when i went on break, i actually sat down and thought up of six very, very good greetings. so i decide that i was going to actually use them, but only on the people who i thought were drunk college kids, or just college kids. so for a while, everything goes just fine, and then this car pulls into lane one. two girls. at the time, i had other things on my mind, so i greeted them w/ a normal "nice vova" greeting. then i figured out that they were college kids, so i put on the act again. yeah, this apparently would have gotten me some good ol' vaginer if it wasnt for a certain reason which ill get to in a second. their response to me after i asked them if they wanted anything else on this fine night, was "well..maybe you, depending on what you look like". here i just cracked up like no other. i really could not think of an answer to that, so i just asked them to pull around while trying not to laugh. they were hot. especially the driver. reeaaaaaallly hot. this is my lucky fucking night! so we start talking, every once in a while, actually focusing on their order. they ordered two #1 meals (big macs), which came to like 8.54 i think, or somethig incredibly close to that. theyre like, "wow, that's kinda expensive.." and give me puppy dog eyes. well, what do i do? promo that sumbich. "oh, i'm sorry, i made an error here, the total is actually $2.36" (again, i think, and if not, then it was very close to that), and give them a very nice smile. yeah, that really got them to like me. then i noticed that we were short on fries, and so i put down a basket, and tell them that it's going to be a few minutes. they apparently thought i was putting down fresh fries just for them (which i wasn't), but hey, whatever gets me closer to my goal, eh? so we continue talking some more. then they ask me if i had a girlfriend! yeah, i currently have a boner the size of the leaning tower of piza, and it seems like the tower just got some more stories added on. i answer no, and they ask me, "why not". honestly, i answered this to them, and it really is the truth "i really want to know that myself". that got sympathy from them. and then my titanic sank (not talking about the boner, though that's a good metaphor, but my situation). they asked me how old i was, and when i answered 18, i could tell, they pretty much lost interest in me, in the "we might just have sex later" way. dammit! if my parents only had conceived me a few years earlier, i couldve avoided this problem. we still talked, and i told them to their face that they were hot, which again, they liked to hear, but my chances were dead. i was still quite nice to them, but yeah....i didnt get laid. they even went and told me what kind of girls i can expect in college, and told me i was cute....but nope....didnt get it
goddammit
"Welcome to McDonald's on this fine night! May I interest you in a scrrrumptious apple pie?"
or
"Welcome to McDonald's on this glorious, peaceful night. May I interest you in one of our exotic fruit and walnut salads?"
...and so on, and so forth. you get the idea. actually, i liked doing that so much (great reactions from the customers) that when i went on break, i actually sat down and thought up of six very, very good greetings. so i decide that i was going to actually use them, but only on the people who i thought were drunk college kids, or just college kids. so for a while, everything goes just fine, and then this car pulls into lane one. two girls. at the time, i had other things on my mind, so i greeted them w/ a normal "nice vova" greeting. then i figured out that they were college kids, so i put on the act again. yeah, this apparently would have gotten me some good ol' vaginer if it wasnt for a certain reason which ill get to in a second. their response to me after i asked them if they wanted anything else on this fine night, was "well..maybe you, depending on what you look like". here i just cracked up like no other. i really could not think of an answer to that, so i just asked them to pull around while trying not to laugh. they were hot. especially the driver. reeaaaaaallly hot. this is my lucky fucking night! so we start talking, every once in a while, actually focusing on their order. they ordered two #1 meals (big macs), which came to like 8.54 i think, or somethig incredibly close to that. theyre like, "wow, that's kinda expensive.." and give me puppy dog eyes. well, what do i do? promo that sumbich. "oh, i'm sorry, i made an error here, the total is actually $2.36" (again, i think, and if not, then it was very close to that), and give them a very nice smile. yeah, that really got them to like me. then i noticed that we were short on fries, and so i put down a basket, and tell them that it's going to be a few minutes. they apparently thought i was putting down fresh fries just for them (which i wasn't), but hey, whatever gets me closer to my goal, eh? so we continue talking some more. then they ask me if i had a girlfriend! yeah, i currently have a boner the size of the leaning tower of piza, and it seems like the tower just got some more stories added on. i answer no, and they ask me, "why not". honestly, i answered this to them, and it really is the truth "i really want to know that myself". that got sympathy from them. and then my titanic sank (not talking about the boner, though that's a good metaphor, but my situation). they asked me how old i was, and when i answered 18, i could tell, they pretty much lost interest in me, in the "we might just have sex later" way. dammit! if my parents only had conceived me a few years earlier, i couldve avoided this problem. we still talked, and i told them to their face that they were hot, which again, they liked to hear, but my chances were dead. i was still quite nice to them, but yeah....i didnt get laid. they even went and told me what kind of girls i can expect in college, and told me i was cute....but nope....didnt get it
goddammit
